Crab Poppers and a scary story

Took a brief hiatus so I could eat healthy! I mean, turns out I could "fry" things in a healthier way, but I needed to be strict for a month. This will happen again in a couple weeks, (ok I try to be healthy all the time...) but I will try to eat Liv's meals just in smaller portions!

Yes, turns out there's an easy solution!

In this episode, Liv makes southern fried brains...mmm...I'd like to order that at a Louisiana cookout.

I decided to make beer-battered fish/crab/brains. Because what else do you do with a PBR...drink it? Come on.

I combined flour, salt, pepper, garlic and cayenne pepper. Didn't measure, made it spicier than I intended, but not by much. I think I was trying to replace paprika. That's the thing about spices...use whatever you want! Right? Right.

Then I added the beer.

I didn't have an egg, but the batter coated just fine without it. The egg I believe will make more of the batter stick to the meat. My first batch was thin and didn't cover the fish completely, so I dipped it in the batter and fried it again. (see below for lil crab pancakes!)

This was "healthier" for two reason...the batter was thinner so less carbs per protein. I used olive oil instead of canola.

Delicious? Mmm. I dipped it in caesar dressing, it was a good call.

THE EPISODE: Even Cowgirls get the Black and Blues...

Clive finally solves a murder!

I don't hate this episode. It has some great Don E and Blaine moments. Rose McIver's singing voice melts me. But I got some complaints.

The plot feels cheap---not that they wrote it in a cheap way, but that's how it ended up. And not just the murder---Gabriel's plot line also felt cheap, or maybe it's his character. He feels like he exists to just defy Blaine in the most black and white way rather than having any real motivations. And that's not me criticizing religion, that's me criticizing using religion as a crutch or a plot device. It made me wonder how Christians would act if zombies were real. Sure, there are many Christians who might act like Gabriel did...but I'm also thinking most of them would set up a "clean-brain-drive". Maybe we'll see that in season 4...

Where in the Bible does it say "thou shall not eat brains" or for that matter "thou shall not make tainted utonium"? What leg does Gabriel have to stand on?

I get refusing to eat brains, but I refuse to believe that's a specifically Christian belief. Not all Christians are vegetarians AND Chief even makes the point that they eat the "body of Christ". I understand transubstantiation is not remotely understood as cannibalism (I think at least). I'm getting tired of writers using Christianity as a one-dimensional character trait and villifying it, or making it an antagonist to the antagonist...whatever. Point is, cheap move.

---

He was coming tonight.

She heated milk and rice over the stove, watching Ved with his toy car out of the corner of her eye.

“I don’t want it, Mama.”

“You think you have outgrown it, uh? You’re never too old for rice pudding.” She her attention back to the stove to see the skin form over the top of the pot. She broke through it with a fork and swept it to the side, watching it disappear beneath the surface.

She looked back at her boy. He pushed his toy car across the table, sending it to plummet and crash below the table, inches from her feet. He scooted off his chair, inching towards the edge until his toes reached the carpet and he could throw his weight to the ground. He ran to his car to pick it up. She looked down at him, bent over, car in his fist. She grabbed him by the curls on his head as he stood up, tugged him close to her and pressed his head into her belly. She put both hands on his cheeks and bent to cover his curly head in kisses. He squirmed, and she held on tighter until he fell limp, submitting.

“How bout I put some honey in it, yeah?”

He squirmed to break free and this time she let him. He ran to his chair and crossed his arms defiantly, but nodded in acceptance at her offer.

She turned back to the stove, not letting him see the grin of victory, but also, the tear that escaped, moistened her lashes and almost fell into the pot. She opened the cupboard for the jar of honey. Not the usual bedtime treat, but after all, he was coming tonight.

As she closed her cupboard, the air pushed open the neighboring door, exposing the vitamins and aspirin. A thought entered her head and she dismissed it immediately. She closed the door and grabbed a bowl.

She set the pudding and honey down at the table, feeling a final flush of steam heat her face. Ved raced his car on the floor, and seeing her near his seat, turned the direction of the car and crawled towards his chair.

He put his palm and fist with the car on the seat of the chair and propelled his body up until his knee reached the height of the seat. He clambored the rest of his body back into his chair and placed his toy next to the steaming bowl. He touched the bowl with a finger, feeling the warmth spread into his hand. He looked at his mother with wonder.

“Careful, my love, that’s hot.”

His eyes narrowed with all the cynicism he could muster from his state of naivety. He seized his car and hid it in his lap.

Her hand had reached out on automatic and she froze as he watched her cautiously, not sure if she would take the car from him, away from him now that he was eating. And when she didn’t move, he knew something was wrong. She felt her heart beat in her throat, the sickness she felt knowing this may be the last time she would discipline him. And why couldn’t he eat and have his toys at the same time? Had she been ruthless with him?

“Mama?”

“Drink your milk, beta, or I’ll send you to bed, no story.” That was more like it.

At ease now, he lifted the cup to his lips.

“Mama, you’re staring at me.”

“Go brush your teeth.” She had felt a pang of regret and she grabbed the half-finished milk. She gave him a light shove and he scrambled out of his seat towards the bathroom.

She re-opened the cupboard with the vitamins. She reached past her common items and retrieved a bottle from the back. She pursed her lips, but she had already made up her mind. She twisted the cap, pulled out a capsule. She put a fingernail into the seam and split the capsule in two, pouring the white powder into the remainder of the milk. She stirred it with her finger, tossed the capsule into the trash.

He’s coming tonight.

Ved lay in his bed, covers to his chin.

She almost thought, Soon, he won’t need me to tuck him in anymore, but she stopped herself. She entered with his milk and set it down on his night stand. She spied the book under his arm and her heart stopped. She had always thought that was an idiom, but she actually felt her blood stand still as if her heart entered a state of shock, if only for a second.

She took a breath and resumed to normal.

“This one, beta?”

He handed her the book and she took it gingerly. She nodded her head towards the mug, but he frowned.

“I already brushed my teeth.”

“Yes, I know, this’ll help you sleep. Trust me.” She barely choked out those last two words.

Her neck bristled as she read him the story. A young boy. The Rakshasa that came in the night. And the mother that couldn’t save him.

She closed the book and stared at the precious glow in his hair and skin. She wanted to pry open his eyes and look at them one last time, but he was already asleep. The empty mug still in his hands. She kissed his forehead, then his cheeks. She held the warmth of his head in her hands and then she heard the crack of a branch outside. The howl of the wind. The tears came more quickly now and they splashed onto his cheeks.

There was a sound she heard in her nightmares, the scraping of claws against her pavement in the rhythm of footsteps, growing louder, growing closer.

She closed her eyes with all her might, but it persisted. Her hand left his cheek. She dashed down the hall, and behind a closed door. Out of sight. She was a coward. But coward or not, he was coming tonight.